Unwritten Laws of a Fast Food Restaurant

So I was thinking the other day, aren't there things that happen at work that always happen? Kinda like the underlying mechanics behind the place. Without these things, the workplace would just run too smoothly, and everyone knows we can't have that. These are not complaints. These are observations from working in fast food for a long time. Anyway, here is a list of little things that you can pretty much count on happening.

1. If there is enough of a product, nobody wants it. If we don't have something, everyone wants it.
2. The fryers only break on days we really need them.
3. If it is dead and people go home early, it will get busy.
4. The tongs are never where you need them.
5. There are never enough towels.
6. You will only be put as order taker on the days you are sick/unshaven/angry.
7. It's never busy on a certain day. Until you work that day.
8. The coupon is never in programmed in the register. When it finally is, it's expired.
9. The menu is constantly changing, therefore only those who work 8 days a week can memorize it.
10. The sink eats scoops.
11. New day, new broken appliance.
12. By the time you remember we have a special, we don't have it anymore.
13. You touch something and it burns you. Two seconds later someone else touches it, it's cold.
14. Arrive on time, there are no customers for an hour. Arrive 5 minutes late, the place is packed.
15. It might not be windy outside, but open up the drive-thru window and get hit by a tornado.
16. Within 15 minutes after the top of every hour we will get customers.
17. If it is the last of something, you are bound to drop it.
18. If you turn up the volume to hear a quiet customer, the next customer will yell into the speaker.
19. Whether you stand around before or after close, the time we get out will always be the same.
20. For every one good customer that you like, there will be five that don't speak English.
21. Without a doubt, someone will pay you in all change when you have the least amount of time or nerves to count it.
22. The inconvenience of a product has a positive relationship to its popularity.
23. The more you like someone outside of work, the more you can't stand them in work.